Enough

I stride toward her

Down the elongating hall

Her smile flicks on and off

Eyes dart

Glisten slightly

I know it, I expect it.

Wearing a suit jacket and khakis,

I bend over and embrace her

The smile is gone

I can’t see it

But I know.

I feel the tiny drops of emotion roll from her face to mine.

Little streams, saying “I failed.”

Each jerk of her lungs is a lashing out,

Crying out that it wasn’t enough

She wasn’t enough.

So much hardship

So much effort

Putting her hands in the dirt

Giving up time

Fun

Friends

For this number on paper

For this means to her ends

Those pieces of paper

Some view as a life saver

That I see as a tormenter

And she knows it

It is her Bane

Her shame

Her blame

And rightly so.

But even though

It wasn’t enough

And seriously

She is so damn tough

No one has the right to make her feel like this

She should never feel this crushing feeling in her chest.

Of desperation in this mess.

Because she is worth a thousand times more

Than any paper, any stone, any land, or any item from any store.

More than this college of ours

More than the sun moon and the freaking stars.

She is enough.

Because she’s so damn tough.

She’ll reach her goals without a doubt

It’s just not fair her path’s so rough.

And here I am,

Holding, consoling, understanding,

But not really.

Never really knowing

What it’s like to be lacking.

To be clawing your way up.

To be reaching for your dreams,

Always knowing they could fall away

At any second of any day

But putting that all behind you

Forgetting it.

Living strong in spite of it.

No, I don’t know what that’s like.

Somehow, I’ve gotten everything I’ve ever wanted,

Somehow, no matter how I mess up,

God’s path for my life is straight and true…

But what about you!?

What about her!?

Why the hell is it so different?

Don’t you know she lives with a passion?

Despite all this tension

She moves with utmost intention

And you throw it to the ground

Shoot a glance in her direction.

She knows how it feels

To be clawing her way up,

To be reaching for her dreams,

Always knowing they could fall away

But still does she have it,

Despite fear and lost hope about it

With no reason left to believe it,

Yes somehow we still have it…

Faith

That’s what it is.

And I’m so proud of her,

For not being sure,

And still ripping through the madness

Pushing through the sadness

Rising past the backless

Embracing the distractions

And loving with a passion

I’m angry.

It’s not fair.

How much people must bend,

But we have faith the plan is true in the end

It’s time I felt what it’s like to not know.

To feel helpless.

Because this time,

When she reaches for the edge of her dream

We can reach together,

as a team.

She said “I’ll miss you”

But the same girl then said

God makes mountains so we learn how to climb.

Up we go.